The Everyday Awesome Project

98: Talk To Your Pain & Make Peace With Your Body

• Polly Mertens & Samantha Pruitt • Season 2 • Episode 98

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OUCH! This week Coach Sam shares the day her back said “NO” and how it can feel like when your life says “STOP.” When her herniated L4–L5 back discs began pressing on her S1 nerve root (sending signals from her back, glutes, all the way down her leg to her foot) what were basic everyday tasks turned into full on battles. Coach Polly & Sam open the curtain on that experience and translate it into a clear plan: how pain signals actually work, why the brain decides what to amplify, and how you can step back into agency even when the pain is loud. Pain happens to all of us sooner or later so learn here how to speak to the pain and make peace with healing. 

We break down the nervous system in plain language—nociceptors, spinal cord gating, endorphins, and the stress cascade—so you understand why your heart races, sleep tanks, and exhaustion builds. From there, we shift to the practical: distinguishing structural pain from normal soreness; advocating with clinicians; using imaging wisely; and balancing pain relief with root-cause solutions. We talk through missed appointments and emotional swamps, then show how to regulate in minutes with breath, movement, and better self-talk so the “central governor” dials down alarm instead of spiraling into hypersensitivity.

You’ll also hear the small, human moves that keep life intact: building an A team that calms rather than catastrophizes, replacing heavy training with gentle walking to pump blood to healing tissues, clearing the calendar to protect recovery, and choosing simple pleasures—like a short coffee run or a few minutes outside—as daily signals of safety. The theme is consistent: protect your nervous system, keep your hope, and take the next intelligent step. If you or someone you love is navigating sciatica, herniated discs, or persistent pain, this is your field guide to staying functional, optimistic, and informed.

If this conversation helps, follow the show, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a quick review to help others find it. Your story might be the nudge someone else needs to choose agency over agony.

-Coach Sam & Polly xoxo 

@everydayawesomeproject 

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Polly Mertens:

Hey, superstars, welcome back. Polly here and Sam Pruitt. What's up, beautiful humans?

Samantha Pruitts:

Oh, it's so good to see you. And you guys, this episode actually um we're calling it talking to your pain. And it's because my dear Samantha here is actually in level nine pain for the last three weeks. So this is not this is no bueno. This is no bueno. We don't like doing topics like this, but um, you are living through something to give an experience, and so you can use it as a teaching moment at the same time, right? Because 100%. You're discovering a lot from this in pain inserting itself in your life, in your body, and in your emotional system. So talk to us like what what is pain? Like, what is the source of this? Tell us what you want. I don't know if you want to tell a little bit of the backstory of what you know where your pain is, if you want to just tell people that, but like what is pain body pain?

Polly Mertens:

Just so they understand why this is relevant to me right now and why I feel so drawn to you know having this conversation. Of course, you and I love to have all kinds of hard conversations. It's kind of what we do. But in this instance, I wish I was not having this conversation, but nonetheless, so I am in pain because I have injured my back. So in hindsight, I can really see it was building through my Iron Man training last year, a lot of tightness, a lot of things that basically I was working through and working with. And it wasn't anything at a level that stopped me, obviously, from completing an Iron Man. So there's that. Um, but then I went into my winter training regiment that was more oriented towards crossfit and lifting and heavy things and still doing some running and whatever. So I actually injured it back in August, helping somebody move up and down stairs, up and down stairs, carrying heavy things, because I'm a strong person and I like to do those things. So that was the initial injury. And then I tipped it over the edge mid-September at CrossFit deadlifting. And you know, we pick things up off the floor all the time, but in CrossFit, you can also do things very quickly. There, this kind of the dynamic of the workouts. So I was lifting heavy things off the floor quickly, repetitively. So many, many rips. And basically, my back just went pop.

Samantha Pruitts:

One too many.

Polly Mertens:

I dropped the weight, I hit the ground, and that was it. So since that day, and that was September 30th, uh 13th, sorry, um, I've been in debilitating pain, debilitating. And basically, what has happened now that I've had x-rays and MRIs and doctor's appointments, whatever, is L4 and L5 are herniated. So what happens is the little um soft, yummy stuff in between our joints, it has actually popped and is oozing out. So that's a very high level out of five. I'm uh uh number four in terms of severity of it. And then S1 is the root where the nerve is. So this stuff is flowing out, it's hitting a particular nerve pattern down my left leg. It's called S1, it's in the sacral joint. And so that nerve is now compressed and getting rubbed and agitated and raw and all kinds of things. So it's traveling down my leg through my hamstring, through my glute, through my hamstring, into my calf, and actually down into my foot. And so it makes it really impossible to basically sit, to drive, to function at any significant level. And so I'm dealing with it, and it's been crazy. Yeah. Sleep, anything. Anything. And so today we're gonna talk about not me and my misery, but like how I have dealt with it, um, perfectly imperfect, and how I'm working through it, and how can I use this to be of service of other people that might be suffering in similar ways or in any way, shape, or form, frankly. You know, how can you talk to your pain? Is um us having a conversation about what happens in the body and how to really resource your way through it, you know. And I think that's a key phrase right there. Like, you know, we talk about self-investing, right? Like self-coaching, self-investing. Like you take responsibility, like a lot of people just hand over the responsibility of their pain and their life and their well-being to people that just don't have the vested interest that we ought to, right? And so you, so nowhere in this conversation do we by any means say not get support? Like, don't talk to a professional. You know, if you are in some pain, please seek out any, you know, Western medicine, eastern medicine, anything to relieve your pain. And what we're gonna talk about is you've been having those convers, like you were trying to get a shot yesterday and you know it didn't happen. So, like you're and you're having steps to get your appointment to see if this is a surgery route or whatnot. So take those steps, and along the way, you still are in this pain, right? Like it's not gone. So that's the point of this conversation is okay, I'm I'm in pain. I'm taking steps to relieve the pain from a medical perspective, from a you know, relief perspective, but there is still pain. Okay, so how do I function? How do I function and not let it take me down? Because, you know, as I was studying this, one of the things I saw was, you know, first you and I were like, who in the hell is living their life and not taking action on pain? Like, yeah. Why would you tell like pain management? That's just like those two don't belong together. Like pain's resolution, you know.

Samantha Pruitts:

Resolution, exactly. As best she can to be swallowed by it and basically give into it is you can't function. I mean, your entire life would just be consumed by this on the daily, and that's not a way to live. And I would say also, you started to kind of go there for a minute, is like listen to the small signals, right? These are messages from your body to your brain, and we'll talk about how that works, that path, those pathways. But um, so I should have also honored myself more initially with these subtle pains that were popping up. And I thought, of course, I'm training at a high volume, a high level for like an Iron Man. Yeah, there's gonna be some pain and discomfort. But there's a difference in like general soreness and fatigue from a hard workout or a challenging whatever else. But then there is structural pain in the body that cannot and should not be ignored. So if people have something that's a one, two, three, or a four now, or it exasperates and then it comes back down, please address it. Please get professional help and find out what is actually the root cause of that. Yeah, and one thing I, as you were telling me the story when it was happening, I had two other friends that I think they both had, well, one had it turned out to be a meniscus thing, and one had a calf strain or hair or something like that. And they too quickly got into action without doing enough like rehabilitation or you know, insurance, whatever, and re-injured, you know. And so, and like you're a little bit of that, like you had uh an injury, you know, or you know, overstrained it, if you will, with the moving, the lifting the boxes. And then maybe, well, and I mean CrossFit just has so much going on. So, you know, like whatever agitated it that day, too much weight, too certain, whatever. Um, so just noticing, like you said, listen to the body's cues. If it's like, I'm not ready, you know, don't be doing this. So but tell us how this brain, you know, so we think of the pain as in your leg, but it's actually technically not in your leg, right?

Polly Mertens:

No, um, it's actually technically in my lumbar spine, L4, right? And but then it's the nerve that is being attacked and how that nerve is communicating to my brain. Yeah. So it's yeah, the injury site is where it is functionally or structurally or whatever, but the pain signal communications in my brain. So let me just read this real quick and kind of give people an idea because maybe they've never had pain. And honestly, I wrote a blog about this and eventually it will make its way to Substack when I get my act together, um, about how shocked I am about this pain. Because I've had so many incidents over my lifetime of experiencing pain, either at my own will and accord and decision making, you know, ultra running and all kinds of crazy things. But even many, yeah, I've had surgeries, I've had all kinds of stuff, but I've never experienced it like this. So it's interesting for me to have this sort of shock about it.

Samantha Pruitts:

I don't know this whole world over here. Like you what the hell's going on? And then you, Miss Wikipedia, like, I gotta get to the root, you know, like get in up in there and you discover this whole new world that now you're the you're you're a resident expert on. So seriously.

Polly Mertens:

It's my body, it's my job to become your domain expert. Hell yeah, hell yeah. So here we go. So when the body is experiencing pain, it initiates a rapid chain reaction involving the nervous system. We'll talk about that, and other physiological responses. Specialized nerve cells called nocepters detect a stimulus which sends electrical signals through the spinal cord to the brain. The brain then interprets these signals as pain, right? So it's just a signal happening, but there's no pain yet until the brain decides it is pain. The brain interprets these signals as pain and activates a stress response, which can include increased heart rate and the release of adrenaline. Simultaneously, the body can produce its own natural painkillers called endorphins. By the way, I really wish it would do a better job of that. Right? But I can understand for me, especially like an ultra running or Iron Man or whatever, you know, I was living off of these endorphins for hundreds of miles.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah.

Polly Mertens:

So maybe I sort of worked through my bank.

Samantha Pruitts:

Well, I was gonna say, and the body's like, no, you need to address this. We're not just gonna soften the feeling of this, because if we do, we know what Samantha does. She just gets right back in the gym and like, no, heck yeah, dude. Don't give her those like those natural drugs.

Polly Mertens:

We gotta keep her going down the track to get this taken care of. Totally. So these um pain pathways, the sensory nerves that I just talked about, uh, specialized pain receptors at the site of the injury. So for me, it's in my lumbar spine and in my SI uh joint, my sacral joint. Um, detect damage from things like heat, pressure, chemicals, um, blunt injury, trauma, right? And convert the stimulus into an electrical signal. The whole body, by the way, is energy and electrical signals, people, in case you didn't get the memo.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah, we may think it's skin and bones and muscle and cells, but it's all energy at the cord. We are all energy in a field of energy. Yeah.

Polly Mertens:

So, of course, we're we're transmitting that energy, right? So we're transmitting the signals travel along the nerve fiber to the spinal cord. You can just envision this happening in the body. The spinal cord is the processing agent, right? The signal is relayed to the spinal cord. Here, it can be amplified or dampened before continuing to the brain. Again, it's deciding. Am I gonna amplify this because she's in danger, life-threatening, or am I gonna dampen it? Oh, she's just running an ultra and she only has 20 more miles to go. Chill out, suck it up. Yeah, I mean, it's kind of interesting, right?

Samantha Pruitts:

Right. Yeah, we can we can take this kind of pain, it's not gonna kill her, you know. Yeah, yeah. But she's in danger if she goes too far, she goes from a four to a five, and what you're talking about, like game over, like no legs, can't feel those legs anymore. Like, how about that?

Polly Mertens:

Yeah, there's a thing in the brain called the central governor, which is basically that's the tipping point of is she is this life or death, or is she fine? And so we play with the central governor a lot in endurance and in sports and races and whatever, because we are pushing the boundaries of some very uncomfortable things, and we have to be telling ourselves, hey, we have to assess what is real, but then tell ourselves, okay, you you're fine, you're safe. Yeah, this freaking hurts like hell, but it's gonna go away. It will pass. You are fine. It's not gonna kill you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not gonna kill you.

Samantha Pruitts:

Um, there's acute pain, but what is it when it's like life-threatening? Like fatal. This isn't fatal.

Polly Mertens:

This is not fatal. Yeah. So the brain interprets all these signals, right? When they reach the brain where it's processed, they interpret as a conscious, subjective experience of pain. So the brain will be deciding for you, people, what is all going on. Okay.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah.

Polly Mertens:

Uh, there's a physical and mental response, of course, the stress response. The brain triggers the stress response, which does redo lead to all these physiological changes in the body, your breathing rate, your blood pressure, your heart rate, um, your body's ability to even deal with whatever the injury is. Adrenaline is released, right? There's an increased demand of oxygen. So, for example, because I've been fighting pain now for weeks and weeks and weeks, I'm exhausted.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah.

Polly Mertens:

Like I'm physically exhausted. Yeah, like compared to your output, right?

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah.

Polly Mertens:

Yeah, totally, totally. Um, reflexes, of course, uh, in immediate, severe cases, a reflex action may occur before the brain has even fully processed the pain, such as pulling your hand away or you know, getting away from the um situation that's causing the pain. And then there's of course this inflammatory response. So that's what's going on with my nerve now. It's so inflamed. And all my movement or activity is creating more inflammation, right? Damaged tissue releases chemicals that cause inflammation, swelling, the influx of immune cells, hallelujah, which is a key part to the healing process. That's another reason why your immune system is so critical. Okay.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yes. So key. But and something that's so like you've tipped it so far over here, immune is not gonna, you know, like there's structural things that um, you know, like you said, some people, I know someone who I don't know what level of herniated disc, you're at a four, right? But they had a herniated, and it went back, you know, like healed itself, you might say. Right.

Polly Mertens:

It can. If you're level one and two and the actual fibers don't break, so the little cushion doesn't break, it just sort of pops out, you know. Yeah, it can pop back in. You can actually literally get it to pop back in and then move on about your business. And actually, a lot of people live that way a lot. Yeah, um, it doesn't mean you don't have to change what the hell you're doing because it popped out for a reason. Yeah, okay.

Samantha Pruitts:

So then you have to go, whoa, don't do that move and I'm an expert in that now.

Polly Mertens:

I've watched a hundred physical therapy and neurosurgeon videos, all these things. Uh so hey, you got that. You should just call me. I'll tell you what to do. Go on YouTube. Um, okay, and then this is really interesting cognitive and emotional factors. This is where the wheels fall off the freaking bus, dude. If you let it, yeah.

Samantha Pruitts:

If you let it be. You and if you don't recognize what is happening. Yeah, this is you where your consciousness can intervene. The rest of it is subconscious, right? The body is doing, the brain is doing all this stuff. Like the brain, like we don't heal our, like, I don't look at my hand and go, heal that wound, heal that wound. Okay, close that up, right? I don't do that. That's all at the subconscious level. It's managed by lots of other things, right? But what you're about to talk about, I just want to insert this is where our consciousness, you listening, can this is where you get involved.

Polly Mertens:

Yeah, yeah. It kind of reminds me of the um in parenting when your kid falls trips or does whatever, and you're like, Hey, do I see blood? Do I see a bloke broken bone? No, okay, yeah, we're good, moving on, right? Or we go, Oh my god, are you okay? And we do this whole drama, and then the kid is crying and hysterical and all these things, right? You can do the same thing for yourself, totally for yourself, you know, cognitive and emotional factors, your perception of pain is influenced by many factors such as your past experience, your mental state, your environment. Oh, dude.

Samantha Pruitts:

I'm just like picturing all the ways that this like goes out into the world.

Polly Mertens:

Like, wow. And then long-term pain. So currently, I'm you know, down that path and I'm gonna get a handle on this as quickly as possible, but nonetheless, it's moving slower than I'd like. If pain is severe and prolonged, it can change how the nervous system processes pain signals, potentially leading to other conditions. You don't want that, in other words, it can get away from you. Don't want that, yes. Right. As really as a form of um pain PTSD, because your body will be easily triggered by all these other things. So you insert yourself. Yep. You go, oh no, not going down that road. No. That's right. Persistent pain can cause the nervous system to become more hypersensitive, which is a survival mechanism that can lead to abnormality over time. Hail to the no, yo, hail to the no. So I did run around and talk to anybody and everybody that I know that's ever had a back thing, right? When I was um trying to figure out what was going on mine. So I initially self-diagnosed that I had something different, and that's part of why I kept going and going to CrossFit. I thought I had a um piriformis syndrome from running an Iron Man. So anyway, I'm not excusing my shenanigans, but I talked to a lot of people with back stuff, and even recently after I got my MRI results, and many, many people, and this just blew my mind, were like, yeah, that I've had that or I have that, and I'm just living with it because I'm afraid of surgery, or this is I'm afraid of that, or this or that, or whatever, and all the stories, right? And I was like, but wait, what's the quality of your life now? Because they have repeatedly re-injured, re-injured, re-injured. Because if it's at this level, it does require some actual assistance, surgery or whatever the process is you're all going to go through. It's your own decision. Um, and then the quality of their life deteriorated, and now they're functioning at 50%. So even for me, it's been whatever it's been now, six weeks-ish. Um, you know, I'm losing cardiovascular fitness, I'm losing muscle, I'm losing overall health and wellness just in that short period of time. Yes, right. So that's not okay. It's not okay to say, hey, suck it up and just live with it. So I really want people to mostly feel empowered that irrelevant of what the thing is, it can be dealed with this dealt with. This is the year 2025. There is so much available knowledge, wisdom, resources out there, and we can get into that. But you have a couple points that you want to make before we move on.

Samantha Pruitts:

Well, I just wanted to like reinforce what you're pointing to, which is like this is where you insert yourself in your own well-being, right? You know, I think there was a a period or a phase pre-internet, you know, whatnot, where medicine looked like there were schools and places where people went to learn about the body and get medicine dialed in, and they became the subject matter experts. They wore white coats and then they had people come to see them when things didn't work right. And you go in and whatever. Well, that's not where we're living today, right? Like all that information is widely available. Um, and a lot of that actually is probably antiquate compared to the things that people self-develop and you know, learn and study because people aren't stuck in just that mode. So just knowing that you have so much information, just as you're doing right now, at your fingertips and video and talking to people and conversations and whatnot, you know, it's like take this into your own hands. You and I have a phrase that we say all the time is how your life feels, right? So this is like how your life feels has something to do with how your body's feeling, right? It's oh yeah, your body is like, I ain't doing good over here. Like, so I have a little tickle in my throat this week, you know, not not feeling 100% energized, right? So I am adjusting, you know, I'm taking some things differently to manage my well-being, manage how this physical state is. Because I I have studied, I learned, I talk to people. I'm like, hey, you know, what what can I do? Because I know you know, I've discovered, like you, like this is what immunity gives us. This is how this helps, you know, when you have good sleep, this is what it offers you. And so everything that we're pointing to here is on a conscious level, insert yourself into taking your life back, right?

Polly Mertens:

Like exactly, right? Exactly. I mean, obviously, you and I stand for empowerment, and in in in empowerment is education, it's resources. Resource yourself to be empowered. I'm not saying I haven't utilized Western medicine. There's a time and place for that, right? Of course, a thousand percent yes. But when you go into those systems, and boy, have I had a lot of experience with that lately. Um, not just myself, but my brother is in a cancer babble, and I have uh other loved ones with some health issues. So it's been a bit of a crazy train. And so I've been really watching and paying attention and trying to be to the best of my ability an advocate for any and all other people around me, including myself. So you go into those source of it, you know. Yeah. Well, and if you decide to go traditional and go into any of these places where those white coats live, be educated when you walk in. I literally go in with a notepad. I have about 20 things, if not more. I make notes in my phone, whatever, I do research, and then I go in, I go, so anyway, X, Y, Z, and here's what I want to accomplish today. So I go in literally with an agenda into these meetings. Yeah.

Samantha Pruitts:

So being curious and collaborative is how I look at those opportunities, right? So they have a perspective and they have some information. You're ultimately the one making decisions about your body. And if you're not, then take that back. Don't be doing that, you know. Like, I mean, I see people all the time taking prescriptions from well-meaning doctors that you know what, if they really study this thing, and I mean, I've seen with my own mom, I think part of her heart attacks this year were, you know, what do you call it when two medicines collide or something like that? Like, I think that's what had her have a heart attack, you know, and it's like a well-meaning doctor gave her one and another one, and you know, and so you have these anyway. So I think most of the people who listen to us are doing this. So we are just gonna move ahead and think that like you're you're already doing this, and what we want to help you with, I think is the most rich part of this conversation is you're about to get to, or we'll get to here in a moment, which is like, how are you navigating? Like, so one thing I just wanted to bring up, which is I'm so glad you're a Buddhist now because helping you in so many ways. Like, I'm and I'm it's rubbing off on me virtually also. So two of my dear friends, which are friends of yours also, Terry and Linda, both earlier this year for different, totally different reasons. Linda was mold, and Terry's, I can't remember what it is, have an itch histamine response in their body that they have been, quote, living with. So Linda had mold in her house, got into her lungs, whatever. And so she's like detoxing, and she left the house and you know, went up to the mountains trying to clear that air and you know, cleaned all her clothes, you know, fixed the house, all that stuff. But there's this um perpetual itch that she's got on her skin in various places. I don't know how much, whatever. It's it's getting better, that she's managing, whatever. And then Terry as well. So they've both got this like itch. And I meet with them and I'm just like, how do you do it? Like, how do you, you know, and Linda probably the most evolved of all three of us is um she's like, I'm I'm working through the phases, right, to get to gratitude, as any Buddhist like you would do, right? And it's like, she's like, I'm not there, you know, but she's gone through, you know, it's like the phases of grief or the phases, you know, whatever, you know, the pissed off at it, that shouldn't be happening. The like exactly what do I do about it, you know, get into action, the you know, acceptance, resignation, whatever. And now she's like getting leaning over into the gratitude, if you're not there, like I said, but um, I brought this into my body to teach me like ultimate gratitude for all suffering, all things that come in this and transform it, right? And transform it.

Polly Mertens:

So totally, totally. And you can do that in phases, and I'm sure she has. So, like just using a quick example of yesterday. So I drive all the way two and a half hours to the coast. I spend the night at my stepdaughter's. I drive another two hours in traffic. I'm in excruciating pain, laying down in the car. So technically my husband's driving me to get to a doctor's appointment to see an expert. Um, and there's no appointment. So a mistake was made along the way there that basically that appointment wasn't mine to be had. So now I'm standing in this office, literally feeling like, you know, somebody just took a baseball bat to me and get this news. So I at that moment, of course, I was shocked and devastated, but I had a choice to make about how I was going to respond. Right. So, of course, there was nothing this person could do. The doctor wasn't even in for the day, they were in surgery or whatever. So I did accept a later appointment, but I immediately went back to the car, regulated my nervous system for 15 minutes in the car, and got my wits about me. Okay, and then dug into my toolbox about okay, I need to just accept what just happened and move forward to the best of my ability with plan B, and then maybe plan C and so on. So made a few phone calls, made another strategy to, again, a couple of days from now go to a different doctor, et cetera, et cetera. So I I kept the power within me to move past this rather than just allowing it to consume me and feeling desperate at that point and you know, powerless. I I didn't, I took action. And everybody can do that, right? So I didn't solve to the pain immediately. That's a longer process, but I can solve to a lot of things along this journey that I do have power and control over.

Samantha Pruitts:

And the thing I just want to point to is um some people think that the response that you had when you heard no appointment should not happen. Like you shouldn't be shocked, like, oh, I should just go jump right into, oh, everything's fine, right? No, like the brain doesn't work that way. So just know that like that that little arc that it's gonna have of like, holy crap, this is, you know, and you just dive into like the abyss, yeah, some sort of emotional swamp, if you will, and you're like, oh, this is never gonna get solved. I've been dealing with, you know, whatever shows up. Give it some space, right? Give it some space. And then you brought your toolkit out and you're like, let me work on me so that I'm not just hanging out in the swamp and feeling bad emotionally, physically, you know, spiritually, all that stuff to the best of my ability, you know, get get the tie, get the boat, you know, rebalanced, if you will, in an emotional level. So yeah.

Polly Mertens:

Yeah. And then we quickly pick something to distract ourselves because now we had to drive three hours home, right? So then it would have just been more pain, all these things. It was like, okay, we're gonna go literally walk around IKEA for an hour and look at random ass things or whatever. But it was literally just to like be distracted and allow these things to kind of move through the body too, yeah, yeah, right? Because all of those feelings were in the body, that's an energy I was carrying, and I needed to mush move that through before I could move on with my day. So good. So that's basically number one on the list is whatever the circumstance is, but we're talking about pain specifically, you have to look at it head on. You have to really you have to be honest about what it is. You can't reject it or be in denial about it. That will not be helpful. It will continue to cascade. Okay, so even if it's band-aided, and of course, they immediately wanted to put me on opioids and medicate me at, and I I didn't accept that that was not going to be a choice that I personally made, no judgment, people, but I that's not the right choice for me. I needed to work with this and work through this and really understand it, right? That is a salve also. That is a way to calm a wound or a pain, also, is to be empowered with knowledge. So look at things head on, don't reject them, accept them and then work with them. Okay. Um, understanding what's really happening. Knowledge is so damn important. I need to understand in my body what in the hell does L4 and five do? What is the S1 nerve root? Where is it going? How does it work? Like those things I needed to have that knowledge and wisdom so I could understand. Um, then processing the emotions, like we just discussed, not allowing the emotions to get trapped, not ignoring them. Yes, I was pissed off at myself, and then I was very sad, and you know, I was all these things. I have races and I had work projects I had to cancel. I have all these things called life that I was not going to be able to do. I'm still in that, right? So that's real emotions around all of that. But allowing myself to have those emotions and move through them to comprehend and move through those. Again, you know, using my tools of resiliency to understand and look at it from a perspective and allowing myself to process those emotions rather than reject them.

Samantha Pruitts:

And processing them, you know, could be talking about them, some of it, like you said, like walking, like movement can just. Help them move through the body so it you know gets the energy that's trapped from those emotions. It can be journaling, it can be uh cognitive, whatever it can be screaming, like you said. Like there's times where you're crying or upset or you know, just tourette's or whatever it is, like yeah, totally get that out, get that out.

Polly Mertens:

Totally. I'm gonna be really interested tomorrow when I go for this epidural. This is a pain management person, and they are the only able to administer this epidural. So, anyway, um, if they also have psychological or talk therapy or some other way to help people, yeah, yes, because that's imperative. Yeah, like I have these resources, people like you in my life, right? I can create these dynamics myself, but many people don't have that, and it is a required element of the healing process. And of course, if they don't have it, I will be telling them they need to add this to their repertoire, and we'll have a conversation about that. Good, good. All right, so becoming empowered, not powerless. We talked about that, right? Yeah, uh building an A team.

Samantha Pruitts:

Well, I just want to say one, I just want to say one thing about that. So that is, you know, that serenity. So what did how what's the line?

Polly Mertens:

Oh, the serenity prayer?

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah, right. So what's the line though that you just said? Like uh becoming empowered, not yeah, becoming empowered. So not powerless. Yeah, a phrase that aligns with that is what you know, except except the things I cannot change. Yeah, change the things that I can. Like, where can I what's outside? So this pay this appointment didn't happen. I can't make the doctor come here, right? Okay, you get into like what is in my control? Like, what do I have choice about, right? Some of that's inside. You went out to the car and you took some choice. And you know what? Give me a hot second here to like I'm gonna choose to take back my power and how I feel. I'm not gonna let myself wallow in this and spill this all over day. I mean, you know, sure, you were talking about it, whatever, but like I'm not gonna ruin everybody's day around me because this is is painful. I'm gonna get it out, I'm gonna process it, I can take some actions, make some phone calls, maybe I can learn a little bit more and whatever, get support. So that's what I mean, what I hear, you know, like don't be disempowered, be empowered. It's like, what can I affect right now?

Polly Mertens:

So yeah, and this one that I just started to mention about building an A team, um, besides practitioners to help you deal with the pain, depending on what it is, it is relationships, right? It's relationships like you and I have. I have a relationship with my partner, right? Like you can talk to people, and you really want to have the right people to talk to. So, for example, you could be in a family unit or in a workspace or whatever, where they're gonna actually pour gasoline on this. Oh my God, they're gonna catastrophize, they're gonna do this whole thing, and they're gonna feed you the opposite of the nutrition that you need. Right? You need people to stay calm, to be intelligent and help you find resources, whether that's information or otherwise. You and I do this all day long for other people. So it's really interesting when it's us doing it for ourselves or other people sending it. And I have some people I lean on, like, hey, I they're trying to give me this drug for nerve pain. I know who to talk to about that drug, I know how to research that drug, whatever. So, again, those resources are available. But when you build your A team, you really need to not just say, Hey, this one doctor is now in charge of my life and my healing. So, whatever they say, right? Because then I would just be on opioids right now, laying in bed for the last six weeks.

Samantha Pruitts:

If anybody's had any kind of experience with interacting with a doctor or getting a procedure or something, it doesn't happen like in days, it happens in weeks and months, right? So whatever you're experiencing will prolong it if you just turn it over, you know, it's like, well, we got an appointment with the so-and-so in three months. And it's like, and in the meantime, and in the meantime, get up to stuff. Yeah, like if you, you know, look at what's to get up to, yeah, talk to people, have conversations, so that that, like you said, you go in there informed, you're collaborating, you're curious, whatnot. Maybe they have some information to add to it, or they are the source of like for you, um, either pain relief that only a writing prescription physician, epidural kind of thing, or a specialist, surgeon, could deliver. Otherwise, what else is out there? You know, like what else is out there?

Polly Mertens:

Yeah, if I had done that technique, I basically would be laying in bed on opioids right now. And the other one of the other persons I saw um basically said, no activity. The only thing that feels good for me right now, and this has been for six weeks, is to actually walk at a low intensity and mobilize my tissues and my structural systems because it brings blood flow there, which brings oxygen. And by the way, the way the spine works, just like the lymphatic system, there's no pump. Okay, so we are the pump. The pump is the movement of our body to bring oxygenated blood and ideally healing elements into the spine and the pelvis and the joints and the tissues. So if I were just doing zero, A, I'd be incredibly depressed. Yeah.

Samantha Pruitts:

I was just gonna say the empowerment.

Polly Mertens:

We have another problem.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah, yeah. Because you'll add to it the mental cognitive of oh my god, I'm so helpless. I can't do it, you know. Instead, you're like, I'm gonna do what I can do. Oh, look at me walking. Oh, I actually feel better walking. I'm taking care of myself. Look at how good I'm being to me. You know, like all of that can show up, right? Exactly.

Polly Mertens:

Exactly. Yeah. Okay, so also plan the time out. So one of the things I did very quickly, literally the day of my diagnosis, I probably told you about this, but I signed up for an online course I've been wanting to take for almost three years with Dr. Stacey Sims, who I just freaking love. And I was like, oh, I'm gonna have all this extra time because I cancel work projects and I can't do this and blah, blah, whatever. So I can get some education that I'm fired up about. So I did that and I cleared the decks. Nothing else was gonna be important for this period of time except for my healing modalities, whatever that was gonna look like. So I had to clear the decks.

Samantha Pruitts:

And that may require a team. Like you're you have um, you know, some people have a lot of responsibilities, whatever that looks like, you know. And so calling in a team to support you, like this isn't forever, or maybe it is, you know, the thing that you're dealing with maybe ongoing. So look at your team with that lens, but find a team to support you in, you know what, I'm not gonna be able to do this anymore. Oh, I need some help over here, or can you do this for me? Or what does that start to look like, right? You really went kind of inward. It's like, you know what? Because you do a lot out in the world, and you're like, I'm gonna do a lot of me for a while, which is beautiful. You're giving yourself that gift because I know on the other side of that, it's all gonna come out and be shared and offered, and you know, the world is gonna, you know, wreak the fruits of what you're you're studying.

Polly Mertens:

So so good. But even funny things like I can't literally put my shoes on, so I haven't put my shoes on for six weeks. So currently my husband is putting my shoes on. Okay, that's kind of hilarious and comical, but also beautiful and lovely. Like, why not? Why not have people in your life be part of this process? And rather than, oh damn it, I gotta do it or whatever, like making angst around it, making drama around it, you know.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah, and it's team and caregiving. Like I remember when my stepdad he had Parkinson's and could no longer button his shirts, you know, and it's like, and we'll never be able to button, you know, he's passed away now, but like for years, couldn't button a shirt. So he never, you know. So my mom was always putting it there to put his clothes on with him, you know, or whatever the things are, you know, those things. So I mean, there's gonna be a time where we're all gonna need some help, right? Totally, whether it's short-term, temporary, in the middle of a 50 years old, 60 years old, or whatever, or a little bit longer at the end of our life, right? Whatever that looks like. Be as short as possible, any you know, things, but uh it's great to rely on people, like you know, totally.

Polly Mertens:

I'm laughing because you know, my brother's in cancer treatment and he's got neuropathy and all these things. So last time I was there, you know, I cut his toenails, I shaved his face, I did all these things that I would never have done for my brother. It was wonderful, it was kind of hilarious. Yeah, and but it was like it needs to be done, and it's yeah, exactly. Yeah, it's very sweet. It's cool, it's cool. We were laughing about it. I wanted to paint his toenails. He didn't get on board for that, by the way. Um, so plan timeout, clear the deck, stay engaged, and then find simple pleasures. So I mentioned to you, and you're not surprised in the very least, but I can't barely get in the car and drive. It's excruciating. So, for very small amounts of time, and I have ice everywhere and all these things, it's so ridiculous. But you have to be finding comedy in it. Literally. And when I get in and out of the car, literally it takes uh enormous amounts of time. But anyway, I still go for my morning latte to my favorite coffee shop because it a, it's a treat for me, it's a simple pleasure, but then also it allows me to be engaged with the world. Yeah, yeah. Yes, these are my people. This is my life, is still normal. I still do these things, even though I can't do all these other things. I'm doing things that really are bringing me joy, simple pleasures, yeah, go so far. It's incredible. And this can be, you know, for anybody, it can be music, it can be whatever the thing is. Like, don't give up everything because this one piece of your life is impacted by this pain. You know, again, don't let it swallow you whole. You're still a normal person.

Samantha Pruitts:

And I want to and just encourage, you know, there's so much that people lean on the internet slash social media for, you know, to distract and stuff like that. And I I would just want to insert and say, use if this is something you're facing or someone you know is facing, to open up a doorway to something else. Like what else? Like use to, like you said, your pleasure is connecting with people and the joy of the coffee and all of that and stuff. You know, maybe you take up painting, you take up, you know, just enjoying music, you sit out on your porch or whatever you can do, like don't go to that default, like, oh, I'll just distract over here, right? Like there are other things that are probably very close, wanting to be experienced by you. And if you just look around a little bit, um, there's simple pleasures in lots of domains everywhere, right?

Polly Mertens:

Yeah. Yeah, just being outdoors and sitting on the porch or whatever, listening to the birds, like all of the little things that maybe you were too busy before to do. How about guess what? Now you have this great gift.

Samantha Pruitts:

I'd be doing that. I'm sitting here and in my outside my office, the window, there is this one plant that grows uh in my garden, and it's this giant, like green, like it looks like a um, I don't know, um, dandelion or something. So it's got all these green things, and it grows big and it grows big and it's like almost to the size, the height of the house, and then it puts out these little tiny yellow flowers, and I'm like, all of that work, these little little flowers at the top. I'm like, that's kind of like a massive effort. Those must be really important flowers to whoever needs those bees or whatever needs them or whatever. But just taking in that joy and the wonderment of there's so much around us. Our natural world is just amazing. Amazing. So it is amazing. I love it. Well, I am so appreciative, and I know our listeners are that you took this time, while you are not feeling well, to transmute, you know, what you're going through and all that suffering into contribution. And, you know, hopefully someone was touched by this and got something that they're putting into their life. They're having a reframe, they're gonna take a different action, they're gonna pull something out of this that is a gift for them that gets their power back into their body and their domain, and they feel better, they feel more inspired and encouraged to, yeah, be more like Samantha. Look at her, she's over there in level nine pain, but she's not just letting it take her down.

Polly Mertens:

So that's no, I mean, I have my moments. I gotta be honest. You know, there's moments that are pretty horrific, and I just work through them. Like for me, the number one takeaway for the audience would be understanding that again, and we've talked about it in prior episodes. Your nervous system is the key. The key, key, key to handling and managing this conversation with pain. So you need to understand how your nervous system works, and you need to work with it and support it, help to regulate it, right? Because otherwise it will become so dysregulated through these pain pathways, and it'll get away from you. And that's not necessary. You can definitely have agency over that.

Samantha Pruitts:

So good. So good. Well, I'm so glad that you're getting your shot tomorrow. May that bring you delicious relief, and you know, whatever this journey looks like, we're all here for you. I'm here for you. You have a team, you have all the love. Um, so glad you're taking really good care of yourself. It means so much to see you as well as you are. I know you're not you're 100%, but as well as you are.

Polly Mertens:

So thanks, lady. Thanks. Yeah, yeah. Well, remember people. Remember people. How your life feels is more important than how it looks.

Samantha Pruitts:

Yeah, and every day is your opportunity to find you're awesome.

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Polly Mertens

Co-host
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Samantha Pruitt

Co-host